Thursday, 27 November 2014


"If music be the food of love, play on"
-William Shakespeare

 Music, in general, can be a very powerful thing. Throughout history, it has been used in various ways; as a means of expression, a means of entertainment, and even to incite war or peace. The right kind of music can also act as a mental aphrodisiac (as you're probably already aware). Some songs, such as Marvin Gaye's Let's Get It On, have become almost synonymous with lovemaking. Here's a compilation of fifteen songs (in random order) that are guaranteed to give you goosebumps and make you want to hook up with someone fast.

1: Color Me Bad: I Wanna Sex You Up

We Can Do It Till We Both Wake Up....
This song basically had yours truly thinking about sex back when I didn't even have any business thinking about it. While it's up-tempo enough to groove to in a dark corner of the club, it's also smooth enough to transition to a party just for two.


2: Next: Too Close

You're Dancing Like You're Naked...
Like its predecessor, here's another dance number that'll make the guys wish they were receiving a private lap-dance.

3: Paula Abdul: Rush 

No One Else Has Touched Me So Deep Inside....
My female readers will definitely get where I'm coming from with this one, and all the soft, sensitive dudes will as well.

4: Foreigner: Hotblooded

Is My Timing Right? Did You Save Your Love For Me Tonight?

The name says it all. This rock oldie is a tale about a guy trying to get his after a party (Sound familiar)?

5: Ne-Yo! Sexy Love

She Makes The Hair On The Back Of My Neck Stand Up With Just One Touch...

A lot of you will remember this one. It was huge just a couple of years ago, and it's still going strong as one of the most sensual R&B songs ever written.

6: Usher Raymond: There Goes My Baby

I Dig The Way That You Be Pokin' It Out, Girl Give Me Something To Feel On....

Right on the heels of Sexy Love is this dynamite tune by Usher. Many females will dig this one because it pays homage to the extra effort us girls take to keep our look tight, and to impress that special someone in our lives. All that appreciation can make you want to reward a dude....

7: Rihanna: Shut Up And Drive

You Look Like You Can Handle What's Under My Hood, You Keep Saying That You Will, Boy I Wish You Would....

On a first listen you may not quite get what this song is about; it might seem like just another bubble-gum pop number. Pay attention to the lyrics, though....


8: Madonna: Justify My Love

Yearning...Burning...For You To Justify My Love

Madonna has long been known for being overtly sexual, and she lives up to her reputation with what is one of her most  creative, passionate songs to date.

9: Vanity 6: Nasty Girl

 That's Right, I Can't Control It. I Need Seven Inches Or More....

You know I had to put this one in right here! After all, it was the inspiration behind the very name of this blog. One for the inner freak in every female ;-)

10:  Jessica Simpson: Sweetest Sin

 I Want You So Bad That I Can Barely Breathe...

Rumored to have been written about Simpson's fantasies surrounding her first time making love with then-fiance Nick Lachey, this sexy song is an almost taboo ode to virgins (and couples who haven't yet made love) everywhere.

11: Keith Washington/ Chanté Moore: I Love You

There's Something Inside You That Keeps Calling Me...

Even as a kid, this song gave me goosebumps. Now that I'm all grown up, I know exactly why. The perfect song to set the mood for some lovemaking laced with emotion.


12: Janet Jackson: Any time, Any place

 I Don't Wanna Stop Just Because People Walking By Are Watching Us...

I couldn't compile a list of come-get-it tunes without including Miss Jackson if ya nasty. This song is all about the restless rush of adrenaline you feel when you just can't wait....
13: Tina Turner/Barry White: In Your Wildest Dreams

I Smell Your Skin, I Feel You Breathing...Don't Let Me Go...

This right here is a song for the grown folks. No one knows how to tastefully and craftily sing about lovemaking like the legends, and this Tina/Barry duet is no exception.
 14: George Michael: Father Figure

That's All You Wanted...To Be Warm And Naked At My Side....

This song is one of my personal favorites. Don't let the title throw you. The idea of a grown man acting as some woman's "father figure" is a bit twisted, but listen closely and you'll get to the part where George says "I'd love to be your daddy, girl please let me" and it won't take you long to figure out that "Father Figure" is just a clever twist on saying "Who's you're daddy" when you're doing the do. Another example of freaky meets artistic ;-)


15: Usher Raymond: Dive

Can't Help It...I Want You To Feel Me...Every Little Bit Of Me...

Okay, I know this is the second time an Usher song has appeared on this list, but you've gotta admit, when it comes to sexy this dude just gets it, every time. I was first introduced to this song while watching the movie Baggage Claim, and knew instantly that I had to hear the rest of it. I wasn't disappointed. A soothing melody with an ethereal feel, and lyrics that'll make you hate spending the night alone, with Usher's sexy falsetto crooning topping it all off, will you want to take it all off. Happy listening ;-)

Saturday, 22 November 2014


Ah, the dreaded breakup. Nobody likes doing it, especially when the holidays are right around the corner. While everybody else is planning thanksgiving dinners and picking out Christmas gifts for that special someone, you're contemplating just how to break the news to your s/o that the relationship just isn't working out any more. Sadly, some things simply can't be avoided, and us girls know all too well that it's far better to dump a lousy boyfriend than to have a lousy boyfriend dump you. Here are five signs that the time is ripe to get rid of your ball-and-chain.

1: He Can't Stay Off His Phone When He's With You

First of all, let me just say that this is just downright disrespectful. If you've made the effort to spend quality time with your man, he should at least be willing to resist the lure of Facebook notifications and Whatsapp messages for a few hours. If he never just puts his phone away and focuses on you when you spend time together, it's a clear sign that uninterrupted quality time with you isn't high on his list of priorities, and if it isn't, exactly what, then, is the point of your relationship?

2: He Ignores Your Calls

I'm talking more than once (matter of fact, you've lost count of the many times it has happened) and you know it because when he finally picks up, he either has a lame excuse for ignoring you or he reacts angrily, as though you're the one in the wrong. Your guy probably answers every call he receives from others while he's with you; yet somehow always manages to miss your calls, particularly when he's with others. This says only one thing: HE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU. And if he doesn't, why force him? Do him (and yourself) a favor and never talk to him again.


3: Unless You Initiate Them, Dates Simply Do Not Happen

Spending another Saturday night home alone? Chances are you blew off your girlfriends to hang out with your beau, and, for the millionth time, he has either turned you down or ditched you at the last minute. Most likely, "something important" has come up for him, so I'm guessing to him, you're not that important. Worse, if you hadn't been the one to ask him out, he never would have had the chance to ditch you, because he never bothers asking you out on dates any more. While you're sitting at home sulking and getting new wrinkles, he's probably out with his boys (or another woman?) painting the town red. Two words: leave him. There are probably plenty of other guys willing to ask out an awesome chick like you ;-)

4: It's Been Over A Year, And He Hasn't Introduced You To His Folks

This includes family and close friends. It's an age-old rule that any man who sees you in his future will definitely introduce you to the people that matter to him. If he has made no effort to do so, nor has he indicated to you that he has any intentions to, you're wasting your time. You should be with a man who sees you as more than just a passing amusement.

5: He No Longer Randomly Says "I Love You"....

....and he seldom replies when you say it. I saved this one for last because it's the biggest, most glaring red flag that your relationship is doomed. If the L word has become more like a more offensive four-letter-word to him, so much so that he seems to cringe when you say it, you're basically hanging on to nothing at all. At the end of the day, a relationship ought to make you feel good, not bad, and there certainly should be some clear goal in being with each other. Don't hold on to a guy that has let you go ages ago. Suck it up like a grown woman should and tell that man to make like a trampoline and bounce.

Friday, 21 November 2014


.....And The Lies They Tell Us

These days, when you meet someone, it's hard to tell if you're actually meeting the real him/her. With all the available options to completely change one's physical appearance, as well as the availability of social networks where persons can basically present themselves any way they choose to, you might want to slow down and tread carefully before you decide to start liking that new man/woman you met.


Question to the gentlemen: how many times have you met a drop-dead-gorgeous woman, only to discover after deciding to spend the night with her that you were in for a big (and not necessarily pleasant) surprise when she took off her clothes/makeup?

I've certainly heard my share of horror stories. I've heard of a guy who went dancing with this chick on their first date, and, after a vigorous bout of busting moves, her eyebrows had somehow managed to dissolve, or, as he put it, she'd "sweat her eyebrows off".

I've heard of a woman who went on a blind date with a tall, sixpack-sporting, six-figures-earning dude she'd met on a dating site; imagine her utter shock when, upon meeting him, he turned out to be 5'4, overweight, and an employee at Burger King.

I've heard of a man who took a beautiful woman he'd met online to dinner, and was delighted to find that in person, she was even more beautiful than she'd looked in her photographs. One thing led to another and he took her home and made love to her. The beauty, before their lovemaking, insisted on two things: one, that he turn the lights out completely and two, that he performed only anal sex. Dude must have thought he hit the jackpot; a beautiful woman who enjoyed anal sex. The next morning 'she' told him she was born a man and was in the process of changing her gender. Yikes....


Ladies, we all know this is true. We've been told so many bullshit stories about "Prince Charming", the perfect gentleman with a good job, a handsome face and an engaging personality, that somewhere along the way, we've actually begun to believe that this "Prince" exists. A man may not have the looks or the money, but if he knows how to work his words, he might just work his way into a woman's heart.

A simple "you looked so beautiful when I saw you today", or an "I couldn't stop thinking about you, so I had to call", is enough to set the sucker-for-romance-type female's heart aflutter. And if her heart isn't fluttering, at least you made her smile, because you flattered her, and what woman doesn't enjoy being flattered from time to time, especially if she's not used to it?

Just by saying enough of the right things, a man can make a woman fall for him. Sadly, anyone can say amazing things without having any intention of following up with matching actions, and often, a woman finds this out the hard way.


 As a woman, I completely understand why women go the distance to present the best possible outlook to the opposite sex. We are bombarded on a constant basis by images everywhere of women with perfect bodies/hair/faces, and men are bombarded by these images too. Many women feel the pressure to look as much like these ethereal images as possible, fearing that if they don't, they won't be able to attract a good man, or any man, for that matter. So they head to the stores, the salons, the websites; anywhere that provides aides that can help them achieve physical perfection, with the hope that, in doing so, they won't be overlooked.

Men have been told for as long as possible that nice guys finish last; that the players-the smooth talkers with "swag"-are the ones that get the women. A man may easily begin to think that, though he may not be an Idris Elba or a Trey Songz, if he learns how to mess with a woman's emotions with pretty words, he might actually have a shot at winning over more than one woman.

Regardless of what we've been trained to think, though, many people still admire genuinity, and one of the sexiest attributes a person can possess is still self-confidence; the ability to truly feel comfortable in one's own skin. So, next time you approach the opposite sex, try presenting your true self (physically and otherwise) to him/her. At least you'll know that, if attraction occurs, it's the real you that they appreciate, and not whom you're pretending to be.

Thursday, 20 November 2014


Yeah, I said it. It's not possible. Even though we've seen it sweetly portrayed on TV shows like Veronica Mars and Friends, in real life, the guy-girl best friend combo just doesn't work out. And here are a couple of reasons why.


...and men, at one point or other, tend to think with their penises. So picture this: you're shooting the breeze with your best male buddy, and, since he's your best male buddy, you don't bother buttoning your blouse all the way up. So what if he catches a glimpse of some cleavage? He's used to seeing you that way by now, right? Wrong. Your peeking cleavage just might be the source of the erection he's trying to hide from you.

If he's looked at you long enough to notice what makes you uniquely feminine, chances are he's thought about sleeping with you at least once; an occurrence that simply won't happen with a girl best friend, just saying....


...and when you do, you tend to get a little more emotional than usual. So a rough day + PMS symptoms + a hug, a listening ear and an attempt to cheer you up from your testosterone-bearing best buddy might just translate to "Oh my gosh, I think I'm falling in love with him".

Okay ladies, all jokes aside, we really are the sex that's more in touch with our emotions. And at times, nothing is sexier than a guy who isn't afraid to show you that he's also in touch with his, maybe not enough to cry during a sad movie, but enough to show genuine concern for you when you're down. Your male bestie won't be your bestie if he hasn't attempted to to do this a few times. All that TLC just might make you fall in love....


...and I wasn't talking about physical nakedness. Okay, that too....but the other kind of nakedness where you trust someone enough to let them in on your dreams, your desires, your fears and your goals. This person has seen you at your best and at your worst, and has stuck by you through it. What better person to become romantically involved with, then?


Having a bestie of the opposite sex certainly has its advantages, but the reality is, because it's a guy-girl friendship, the possibility always looms that it could turn into something more. Good luck trying to keep it strictly platonic ;-)